Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Dead and Deader: Zombie Culture Crack

Zombie movies are like being in an abusive relationship blinded by love. The shitty aspects of their personality are overshadowed by my love for them and the glimmer of goodness I see within their worthless existence. Bad shit. These are my sentiments toward Dead and Deader. The movie didn't exactly cheat on me with my best friend while I was in the next room, more like it bought some dude a drink with my credit card.

Dead and Deader was not all bad. Yes, the plot was spotty and not very compelling, but it had its bright spots. When a military operation to recover a medical team turns into a zombie buffet, Lt. Bobby Quinn wakes up during autopsy to find himself half zombie. He finds that his fallen team has all been infected and after jacking some undead jaw is convicted of murder.

The film becomes Where's Waldo? in the sense that the brave and ridiculously bubbly survivors must track down the host zombie which happens to be Quinn's commanding officer.The movie consists of some scorpions that turned people into zombies, Dean Cain tooling around and eating raw meat, the laundry man from American History X (I think) cracking a few jokes, and some vixen making pop culture zombie references suggesting that women like that actually exist.

Dead and Deader, I Forgive You Baby

The acting is bad.com and the dialogue is bad in a way in which I've never seen. Instead of lines made from Velveeta, it's simply a bunch of cultural references targeted toward people like myself. Halo, Everquest, Sabbath, Devo, The Clash, and Romero are all mentioned for a nerd friendly experience. There's something about an attractive woman in a bra and panties making an Everquest reference in a zombie movie that give people who would rather watch bad zombie survival movies than socialize a ray of hope. Amen to them.

The zombies looked great and the gore was top notch. The death sequences toed the line between disturbing and slapstick, which I always enjoy. After awhile, the gore and blatantly obvious attempts to appeal to zombie obsessed fans make you forget that the plot sucks and the acting is like amateur night. It's possible that I'm giving this movie too much credit and it's actually a steaming pile, but come on. If there weren't people who found some good within piles of shit, we wouldn't have mushrooms.

Unless you're like me and zombie obsessed, just avoid Dead and Deader; I'm sure there are better ways to occupy your time. However, if you share my enthusiasm, definitely check this one out, it beats the fuck out of behaving like a human being. I love you too zombie movie.

1 comment:

  1. I enjoyed this review 1000% percent more than the actual movie.